Fun Size Episode 45 – Nerds Will Always Break Your Heart

We continue our talk with Greg Hatcher and talk about how we’ve been falling out of love with modern pop culture franchises like Star Wars, Star Trek, and the Walking Dead, and why it’s totally healthy to just walk away.

Plus, we talk very briefly about Star Wars: the Rise of Skywalker, and how a toxic fanbase can not only poison your enjoyment of a pop culture property, but it can affect the decisions that producers make in a doomed attempt to please everyone, including the trolls and bigots.

Editor’s Note from Mike: After thinking about it for less than three seconds, Fascism definitely beats out Objectivism in the Bad Ideology Olympics. But Objectivism would still win a medal. Just wanted to correct that dumb mistake said in haste.

Episode 43 – Condorman

He Spies! He Flies! He Death-Defies!

In this month’s Single Serving Selection, we take to the skies above Monte Carlo with Greg Hatcher of the Atomic Junk Shop blog to swoop into Disney’s superhero/spy film that sank at the box office, only to rise again as a cult favorite: 1981’s Condorman!

When bumbling comic book artist Woody Wilkins is chosen for a simple courier mission  for the CIA, he makes an impression on a beautiful KGB agent who wants to defect. Now the only man she trusts to escort her to the West is Woody, who she believes to be a highly skilled secret operative.  Woody agrees to the mission, but only if the CIA will use its resources to turn him into the high-flying superhero from his own comic book: Condorman!

Fun Size Episode 44 – Walking With Dom

We sit down with the notoriously Trek-skeptical Sam Mulvey to give our first reactions to the first episode of Star Trek: Picard. Is it what we wanted, and have modern iterations of Trek changed so much — or have become so rigid — that they’re just not for us anymore?

We talk about fake click-bait pop culture new sites, the trend that the lead-ups to movie releases are now even longer than the Presidential election, and wonder why so many fans are seemingly unable or unwilling to see the humanity of robotic and android fictional characters.

Also, Mike makes a desperate attempt to convince Sam that the Fast and the Furious franchise is something he might enjoy.

Podcasta la Vista, Baby! Episode 22 – True Lies

When he said I do, he never said what he did.

This month, we’re joined by Rebecca Friedman of Ask an Atheist to revisit the always thrilling and often problematic action-spy comedy that reunited Arnold with director James Cameron, True Lies!

To his wife Helen and their young daughter, Harry Tasker is a boring computer salesman, always away on one of his dull business trips. But Tasker has been living a double life as Harry Rinquest, globe-trotting secret agent and counter-terrorism operative for the secretive Omega Sector. But the lies separating Harry’s two lives crumble as Helen is suddenly thrust into a plot involving a Middle Eastern terrorist cell, stolen nuclear warheads, and a beautiful femme fatale. Now Harry must save the world, rescue his daughter and revive his troubled marriage.

Fun Size Episode 43 – Get in a Booth and Pretend to Be Poop

In an episode calling back to us from the near past, we get a little nervous, excited and curious about the then-upcoming Star Trek: Picard. We dig a bit into Trek‘s enduring franchise, both its evolutions and how after almost two decades, is finally moving its timeline forward.

We try to figure out how Wonder Woman and Star Trek Beyond could have gone from very good to great, with the same third act change. We wonder which members of the “Next Generation” crew have the best managerial skills. And finally, we look at how modern audiences — and studios — don’t want to admit that they love inspirational movie heroes.

Hex & Violence Episode 4 – The Latest in Pickling Technology

“That’s Jonah Hex, his own damn self. He’s killed more men than Hell has souls.”

After a long absence, we return with our fourth episode! This time, Mike and Casey claw our way through Jonah Hex’s 1993 Vertigo makeover as a weird western horror character in the five issue mini-series Jonah Hex: Two Gun Mojo by writer Joe R. Lansdale and artist Timothy Truman!

After being falsely accused of murdering a fellow bounty hunter, Jonah Hex runs afoul of short-tempered townsfolk, embittered Apache raiders, and Doc “Cross” Williams, a murderous snake oil salesman, grave robber, and conjurer who raises the bodies of the dead and bends them to his will — including the corpse of famed Western folk hero, “Wild” Bill Hickok!

JONAH HEX CONFIRMED KILL COUNT: 65 (+24 this episode)

Black Ops Episode 19 – Whoa: Keanu Reeves in Theory and Practice [CLIP]

In a discussion recorded back in November, now exclusive to our Patreon supporters, we try to decide in real-time if Terminator: Dark Fate warrants being covered on Podcasta la Vista, Baby! or not.

We talk a bit about our coming post-Arnold future and drop a couple hints at a replacement series. And we mention at least one shelved podcast series idea that we decided to not do.

Is it time for Star Wars, among other franchises, to go away for a while? We talk a bit how major media companies keep trying to recreate the success of lightning-in-a-bottle books and movies to diminishing results.

To unlock this episode in its entirety — and many episodes more! — just support us on Patreon with at least one measly dollar a month!

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Black Ops Episode 18 – An Inspiring Racist [CLIP]

In our new Christmas Eve episode, exclusive to our Patreon supporters, we get both deadly serious and a little bit frivolous.

First, we glance at a brief history of famous pieces of shit who’ve done awful things –  from Michael Jackson and Bill Cosby, to Harvey Weinstein and George Zimmerman – and the people who refuse to believe their accusers.

Then, we delve into what the James Bond franchise loosely calls “series continuity.” We explore the popular fan theory that “Bond” is just a codename and that the different actors who played 007 are different people altogether.

Plus, we think Dave Bautista is really, really great.

*editorial note* – Mike gets the name wrong. It’s Jimmy Saville, not Jeremy.

To unlock this episode in its entirety — and many episodes more! — just support us on Patreon with at least one measly dollar a month!

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Black Ops Episode 17 – Ask Us Anything: 2019 [CLIP]

In our new nearly two hour episode, exclusive to our Patreon supporters, we’re answering your questions in our first Ask Us Anything episode!

We start by sharing three facts about ourselves that you might not know, then we tackle your questions!

We talk about our musical obsessions, past political activism, strange retail job stories, how we met, our adventures with conspiracy theorists on public access television, our respective parenthood and non-parenthood, Al Pacino impressions, Mike’s cancer treatments, desert island selections, and how we first fell in love with our favorite pop culture fandoms. And so, so many digressions.

Included in this episode are questions by David Gutiérrez, Grant Richter, Wesley, Tim Batson, and Gem Newman.

To unlock this episode in its entirety — and many episodes more! — just support us on Patreon with at least one measly dollar a month!

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Fun Size Episode 42 – Hey, I Know That!

We chat a bit with Tobiah Panshin about that great intangible that gets people’s ire up: Fan Service!

What is it? Why is it used as a pejorative? Is it ever a welcome thing? Why does it both delight and frustrate? Amuse and Annoy? We delve into the wherefores and whyfores and try to figure it all out.

Note: This episode was recorded before our last Fun Size episode in October, and we hadn’t seen Joker yet.

Podcasta la Vista, Baby! Episode 21 – Jingle All the Way

Two Dads, One Toy, No Prisoners.

Put that cookie down! Now! Because, this month, Christmas is coming early! We’re getting into the holiday spirit with librarian Kit DeForge, to unwrap Arnold’s holiday comedy Jingle All the Way!

Workaholic salesman Howard Langston hasn’t been the world’s greatest dad. Habitually breaking his promises to spend time with his young son, he vows to make it up to him with a coveted Turbo Man action figure for Christmas. The only problem is that Turbo Man is the hottest toy of all time, and Howard has waited until the last minute. Now, he must contend with an unhinged rival father, an amorous neighbor, stampeding shoppers, a gang of bootlegger Santas, and a vicious pet reindeer, in order to find the elusive toy in time for Christmas, and finally keep a promise to his son.

Fun Size Episode 41 – Clown Ronin

We sit down some more with Patrick Johnson to share our mixed feelings about Todd Phillips’ bleak and controversial Joker film.

We dig a bit into the film’s strong lead performance by Joaquin Phoenix and its very on-its-sleeve cinematic inspirations from films like Taxi Driver, Death Wish and the King of Comedy, and try to figure out whether it actually works or not. Does it transcend both its pastiche elements and its comic book origins, or is it a well-made and ambitious mess?

The answer is…complicated.

Episode 42 – Chopping Mall

Where shopping can cost you an arm and a leg.

In this month’s Halloween-themed Single Serving Selection, we hunker down in the mall with Patrick Johnson to hack into the 1986 cult favorite slasher movie by actual creep director, Jim Wynorski, Chopping Mall (aka Killbots)!

A group of young employees plan an after-hours booze and sex party in a mall furniture store. But when the mall is struck by lightning, its new state-of-the-art robot security force malfunctions and goes on a killing spree. Now trapped in the mall under high-tech lock down, they must survive until dawn, as the robots murder them, one by one.

Fun Size Episode 40 – The Fucking C-Word

We sit down again with Tobiah Panshin to open up a bit about medical scares and Mike’s recent testicular cancer diagnosis and treatment. We dig into the heavy emotional weight that comes with getting scary news from a doctor. We also look at how the fictional depiction of cancer in popular media really doesn’t prepare you for the reality of even a highly treatable cancer.

Plus, we chat a little about the recent, strange anxiety about vaping, and how it compares to past moral panics like video games, rap music, Satanism, and Dungeons & Dragons.

Oh, and don’t vote for Joe Biden. He’s just awful.

Podcasta la Vista, Baby! Episode 20 – Red Sonja

A woman and a warrior that became a legend.

This month, we’re back in the Hyborean Age to battle wizards and monsters with Tobiah Panshin of the House of Jack and Stan to test our mettle against the third and most poorly-received of Arnold’s fantasy epics: Red Sonja!

When her family is murdered and her body defiled by soldiers of the mad Queen Gedren, a vengeful Red Sonja is gifted with great power to take her revenge. Sonja’s help is sought by a dying priestess when Gedren steals an ancient Talisman with the power to make or destroy worlds. Now with the aid of the mighty Lord Kalidor of Hyrkania, Red Sonja must battle to the center of a kingdom of perpetual night to destroy the Talisman, and save the world!